


It's Getting Better (Maybe Worse)

by diangelonnico



Category: Percy Jackson and the Olympians - Rick Riordan, The Heroes of Olympus - Rick Riordan
Genre: M/M, Nightmares
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-05-23
Updated: 2014-05-23
Packaged: 2018-01-26 05:39:47
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,543
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1676756
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/diangelonnico/pseuds/diangelonnico
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Can Jason help Nico?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. A Nightmare

Jason heard the door of his cabin creak open and looked over to see a tall, thin figure stood in the door way. It was Nico di Angelo and he had tear tracks running down his cheeks.

‘Come here.’ Jason said, shuffling up and opening his arms, to the desperate broken boy at his door. This was a regular occurrence now, Jason would go to sleep and Nico would go to sleep in his own cabin, only to have a terrible nightmare and realise it was a terrible idea to try and sleep alone, again. He would show up at Jason’s door, tears still running down his face and Jason would shuffle up and give him a hug. They would fall asleep in each other’s arms, Nico crying into Jason’s shirt and Jason’s nose in Nico’s hair, even though Nico was just as tall as him now.

Nico was seventeen now, and Jason was almost twenty-one. Jason didn’t know what he was going to do with his life so he was still at camp-half-blood, going on the odd quest and training the younger campers. Piper was still there too. Leo had become a god to be with Calypso, and he was ever more distant. Percy and Annabeth had went to college in New Rome, but had both dropped out because Annabeth got pregnant, she was now pregnant with her second child at twenty-two, but they were happy and that’s all that mattered. Frank and Reyna were still both praetors at New Rome and Hazel was still in the legion there. Everyone visited each other from time to time.

Nico’s hair always smelled of shampoo. He must always have a shower before he goes to bed. It broke Jason’s heart to see Nico like this, and he saw him like this far too often. Nico and him had become best friends after the war with Gaea. Jason had convinced him to stay and slowly, Nico had opened up to him, they didn’t have any secrets anymore. Jason loved Nico, but in a platonic way, not the same way he loved Piper in, but just as much and Nico loved Jason the same way, they were kind of like brothers.

In the morning Nico and Jason would wake up, and sometimes they would talk about it, sometimes they wouldn’t. On a bad day Nico wouldn’t say anything at all, and Jason would let him, he would listen if he wanted to talk and he wouldn’t push him if he didn’t because he knew that around Nico, everything you did or said was like stepping on thin ice, something could go wrong at the slightest word or touch or action, even now, after almost four years.

Jason remembered the first time Nico had appeared at his door after a nightmare. It had been a few months after the war, when Nico and Jason were becoming closer. Jason had always tried to make sure Nico felt like he could be accepted. He had made sure Nico knew that he was always there if he needed him for whatever reason because the moment Jason asked Nico to stay and Nico said yes, Jason had mentally swore on the Styx that he was going to fix this broken little boy. So Jason had told Nico right then and there ‘if you ever need a shoulder to cry on, you know I’m here.’ And Jason didn’t think Nico would ever look for that shoulder but he did, and Jason was so glad he did because Jason knew he cried all alone in the hades cabin, because that boy had issues, but Jason knew not to ask him about it or try to comfort him when he didn’t want to be comforted. But when Nico showed up at his door Jason was glad, because he felt as if Nico trusted him, that Nico was his friend and he was Nico’s.

That one night so long ago, at about one in the morning, Nico had knocked on his door, waking Jason up. Jason shouted ‘come in.’ and so Nico did. He walked up to the bed and stood over it, his black bangs hiding his face slightly, but Jason could still see he’d been crying, was still crying. ‘What’s wrong?’ Jason had asked. Nico didn’t say anything just stood there shaking. It took Jason a moment to sift things through in his head but eventually he said ‘Nightmares?’

Nico nodded solemnly. ‘Worst one yet.’ He told him, his voice hoarse. ‘Can I – can I sleep here tonight?’ He’d asked, his voice breaking a little in desperation. ‘I don’t want to be alone.’ He said as he closed his eyes and tears dripped down his cheeks.

‘You never have to be alone Nico.’ Jason had told him pulling him into his bed with him.

Nico didn’t protest, just held onto Jason for dear life, burying his face in his chest. Nico had been a lot shorter back then, when he was only fourteen. He was a massive seventeen year old now, still very skinny but extremely tall. He’d grown so much over the past three years and had finally gotten a haircut. A lot of the girls thought he was hot, but obviously Nico wasn’t showing any interest back. He was over Percy though. Nico visited New Rome regularly and he was close to Percy and Annabeth even. It turned out Nico was surprisingly good with babies and kids, but not animals, never animals.

Today, it was a good day because Nico did want to talk about it. He sat on the end of Jason’s bed and looked down at the floor, lacing his fingers together between his knees. ‘I saw Bianca.’ He took a deep breath. ‘I saw Bianca fall.’ He said so quietly Jason could barely hear him. Then Nico’s voice cracked, ‘And there was nothing I could do. I just had to watch.’

Jason looked at Nico, and saw the pain in his eyes. ‘It’s okay now.’ He told him.

‘sometimes I see Hazel. I used to see Percy. I sometimes see you, but never Bianca.’ Nico hung his head so Jason couldn’t see his face. ‘sometimes I don’t see anyone at all. Sometimes the nightmares are different, not in Tartarus.’ He continued.

‘never Bianca.’ Nico whispered. ‘not Bianca. not in tartarus’ A teardrop landed on his pyjama bottoms. ‘They’re getting worse.’ He whispered to Jason gravely looking him in the eye. His eyes looked like shattered glass again, and Jason worried that maybe Nico couldn’t be fixed, maybe all this effort had been for nothing, but no, he couldn’t and wouldn’t give up now. He had grown to love Nico like a brother and would do anything for him. He went over and sat next to him on the bed and rubbed circles on Nico’s back, but today was turning into a bad day because Nico flinched away and wouldn’t let Jason comfort him. He didn’t some days.

Jason sighed and Nico got up and moved away. Seeing Jason’s hurt expression Nico said ‘I’m sorry. I just, I can’t right now.’ Jason nodded, he understood. Nico opened the door and as he did he said ‘I’m going to get dressed.’ Then a smile creeped onto his face, that didn’t quite reach his eyes and he said ‘before anyone catches me in your cabin.’ The little rebel, Nico was always bending the rules a little.


	2. Breakfast

Nico still looked sad at breakfast, brooding over his cereal, not really eating it, just stirring it round. ‘Did your mother ever tell you not to play with your food Mr di Angelo?’ Mr D asked him from the head table.

‘My mother’s dead and no-one else cares enough to tell me.’ Was all Nico replied. Mr D sighed, it was going to be a long day if Nico di Angelo was being difficult, Jason just knew it would be and a lot of the campers did too, but Nico didn’t care, he did what he wanted and everyone let him. No-one said anything after that and Nico got up and walked off into the woods. If anyone else did that, someone would probably stop them, to warn them of the monsters that would most probably kill them if they went into the woods alone, but not Nico di Angelo. Nico could handle a few monsters, Nico could handle a lot of monsters.

Nico came back about 40 minutes later, an actual smile on his face. He sat across from Jason ignoring Chiron’s protest. Nico di Angelo did what he wanted. ‘I talked to Persephone’ He said. ‘She told me I’m welcome there anytime.’ By there, Nico meant the underworld. ‘I’m glad to have things cleared up with her, I mean, I’ve been thinking about iris messaging her for a while and sorting stuff out because it was obvious she didn’t like me and I wanted to know why and stuff and I’m glad I did talk to her.’

‘Why did she not like you then?’ Jason asked.

‘Well, it’s a long story really. Obviously there’s the whole thing with Hades and my mom and how Persephone was jealous and stuff but then she can’t have children of her own and she always wanted them and stuff and she just I don’t know, didn’t like me for that but it’s all cleared up now.’ Nico said cheerily. Bless that boy, he always tried, with everyone. Nico laughed. ‘Sometimes I forget it’s nice to be happy every once in a while.’ His smile dropped. ‘I need to remind myself that not all memories are bad memories.’ Nico’s smile turned into a sad, nostalgic smile. Jason didn’t say anything, he didn’t know what to say.

Nico got up shortly after that and went to train; he usually did his own thing when he was having a particularly bad day. After a long day training the younger demigods, Jason went for dinner and saw Nico sat at the Hades table. As soon as Nico saw him his face lit up in a smile and he went to join Jason at the Zeus table. ‘I’m okay now.’ He promised.

‘Good’ Jason said, and he proceeded to tell him about his day. Nico told him about his day too. ‘Are you sleeping in my cabin tonight?’ Jason asked Nico as they walked over to the cabins after dinner.

Nico shook his head. ‘I’m sure I’ll be fine.’ He told him. That’s what he said every night. Jason knew he wouldn’t be fine. Jason knew that sometime between midnight and four Nico would wake up screaming and shivering and would try, try, try to get back to sleep but would eventually end up at his door, in his pyjama bottoms and an old t-shirt. He would crawl into Jason’s bed and snuggle up to him, crying into his shirt. Sometimes he would tell him what it was about, sometimes he would wait till morning and sometimes he wouldn’t tell him at all but Jason knew it was nightmare and he knew that Nico wouldn’t be able to cope alone like he had for so long.

In the morning the tears would be gone and Nico would be okay (on most days) and they would go about their daily routine, but the next night Nico would say he was fine and that he could get through the night for once and the whole routine would start up again. Jason didn’t mind holding Nico while he cried in the middle of night, sometimes even while he screamed but Jason did mind that Nico’s mind was torturing him. Jason did mind that Nico wasn’t okay and he was going to try and fix him, he’d been trying for almost three years now. He wasn’t ever going to give up on his best friend.

That night was exactly the same as always. There wasn’t really anything else to say.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> R & R greatly appreciated!


	3. Chapter 3

Nico was just sat against the side of the Zeus cabin when Jason found him. He looked up at Jason. ‘Where have you been?’ Nico asked. He sounded sad.

‘I went on a date with Piper. You knew I was going on a date with her today.’ Jason said, looking down at Nico. The poor kid looked upset. He was fiddling with a statue, a figurine – probably the one he always had with him, the one he fiddled with when he was nervous or upset, it was the mythomagic figure of Hades that Bianca had died for. Then it hit him. Jason smacked his forehead. He knew exactly what happened today, all those years ago. This was the anniversary of Bianca’s death, and Nico always got upset on this day. ‘Oh, gods. Nico, I’m so sorry.’

It was clear now that Nico had been, or was crying. ‘I am so, so sorry.’ Jason continued. ‘You should have said. Ugh, I’m so stupid.’

‘It’s … It’s okay. I’m used to people forgetting about me.’ Nico said. He almost sounded like Eeyore.

Jason sat down against the wall, next to Nico. It was getting dark. ‘Anything I can do to make it up to you, I’ll do it.’ Jason told him sincerely. ‘I’ll suck you off if it makes up for it.’ He laughed.

Nico looked at him, half-heartedly smiled and shook his head as if to say what an idiot. ‘I don’t think Piper would like that.’ He said, not looking at Jason. ‘I don’t want a blow job anyway.’

‘I’m being serious.’ Jason told him.

‘I don’t want you to suck me off.’ Nico said, still turning the figurine around in his hands.

‘What can I do to make it up to you?’ Jason asked him solemnly.

Nico eyes brimmed with tears then and he just let go. He leaned his head against Jason’s shoulder and cried into it. ‘Just stay here now.’ He sobbed into Jason’s shirt. Jason put his arms around him and held him together.

‘I’m so so so sorry.’ He kept murmuring to Nico, in a soothing rhythm, rubbing circles on his back. Nico let him. He stopped talking after a moment and everything was silent.

‘Why didn’t you tell me when I said I was going out with Piper?’ Jason asked once Nico had calmed down a little.

‘I wanted you to go and have fun. You spend all your time with me crying into your shirt, I thought I’d shut up and be a bit of a man for once.’

‘I don’t care about having fun. I care about you being okay… and you’re clearly not okay. Why didn’t you call me?’

‘I didn’t want to bother you.’

‘It wouldn’t bother me Nico. If you ever feel like shit, like you need someone to hold onto, I’m here for you.’

‘I don’t need anyone to hold onto.’ Nico said determinedly.

Jason sighed. ‘Whatever you say.’ He was going to argue and say That’s what got you into this mess in the first place, but he thought that might make it worse, and it would probably be a little insensitive.

‘But, I wouldn’t mind if you stayed for a while right now.’ Nico tacked on looking up at Jason through wet eyelashes and tear filled eyes. Jason wasn’t going to say no so he sat with him, Nico’s head rested on his shoulder and his head resting on Nico’s head. They sat like that for hours.

They talked into the early hours of the morning and fell asleep as the sun was coming up. Nico told Jason about his childhood with Bianca. He said it wasn’t as painful talking about it anymore now that all those years had passed. He said his childhood almost felt like a dream, the lotus hotel had separated it from reality for him. He told Jason about his mother and about Venice and about the rare visits from his father. He told him about the day trips they would go on and about when they moved to America at Hades wishes. He told him about the Lotus casino and the year they spent at Westover hall. Jason didn’t know much of this, only bits and pieces, but hearing it all, he knew Nico trusted him.

So Jason told Nico about his childhood, because he trusted Nico. He told him about when he tried to eat a stapler, and how Thalia stopped him. Nico laughed at that part. He told him about his mother and how she never cared for them. He told him about Thalia’s threats to leave and about how his mother was always drunk. He told him about when Hera had taken to him to lupa and how he had ended up at Camp Jupiter. He told him about his childhood there and about how he rose to Preator.

When he stopped speaking, Nico told him about when he first came to camp half blood. He told him everything. ‘If you don’t want to listen to me blabbering on, just say.’ Nico had said. Jason didn’t mind listening, he wanted to listen. Nico told him about the manticore and the hunters of artemis. He told him of how Bianca joined them and how it broke his heart. He told him the last ever words Bianca said to him, ‘You like like Percy, don’t you? Just like one of them heroes from your game.’ She’d said. Jason thought it was amazing how Nico could remember that, after seven years.

He asked him how. Nico said ‘I don’t know, I loved her and I wanted to remember everything I could about her. They were the last things she said to me, alive so I suppose I gonna remember them for the rest of my life.’ Poor kid Jason thought.

Nico told him of his short few days at camp half blood and how the nightmares started then. He told him of the day he felt as if a chord had been cut in his soul and how Bianca didn’t come back with the quest party. He told him of when Percy told him Bianca had died and how he had run away. He told him that he had realised that that chord cutting feeling was Bianca dying and how he was afraid of himself. He told him about when he found the labyrinth and about his months there. He explained his months spent sleeping in graveyards and re-gaining his memory and he told him about the war with the Titans and how he took Percy to the styx. He told him how terrible he felt when Hades tricked him and how he convinced his father to help in the battle. He told him of how he stayed a camp half blood for a few months, until the gods started whispering their secrets in his ear. He told him about the secrets (of the two camps) his father told him and how he felt when Percy went missing, then when he found him and couldn’t tell anyone. He told him about finding Hazel and he told him about Tartarus and the doors of death. Eventually he told him about the Jar in Rome and how he had given up hope and then he said ‘and you know the rest.’

He told him everything, and by the end he was exhausted and just fell asleep. Jason sat staring into the darkness thinking about what a hard life this kid had had. Jason thought his life had been hard but hearing about Nico’s, he had to think again. Jason’s childhood had been bad and his teen years had been mostly good. For Nico it was the other way around. It was good, well, great really and then it turned bad later on, it turned very bad. Jason didn’t know what to say, but he didn’t need to think of anything because he fell asleep too.

They woke up to the sun shining brightly in their faces. ‘Jason. Wake Up.’ He heard Nico say. Jason opened his eyes groggily.

‘eurghhh.’ He muttered. ‘what time is it?’

‘I don’t know. Early?’

Jason slowly stood up.’ I better go and get some actual sleep in an actual bed then.’ He said.

Nico laughed at that. ‘Stop being such a whimp. You don’t have to sleep in a bed. For example, graveyards are perfectly good places to sleep when you have nowhere else to go.’ He smiled up at Jason. Jason’s small smile dropped instantly and upon noticing this, so did Nico’s.

‘What?’ Nico asked.

‘Nothing. I just remembered something.’ He lied. He had remembered how little Nico had, and how he always refused help no matter how many times it was offered.

‘What?’ Nico insisted.

‘I . .. er.’ He’d better just say it. ‘I realised how little you had.’

Nico smiled half-heartedly then. ‘I got through it. I always had the underworld, I just didn’t fancy it when Persephone was there annoying the crap out of everyone.’

‘Oh.’ Jason said. ‘You have a room in your dads palace?’

‘Yeah. Where do you think I go when I’m not here?’

‘I don’t know.’ Jason said and walked off. Nico shook his head. Jason cared too much, but Nico cared a lot about Jason too, he never thought they’d become this good friends, but they did.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I think this is it for now.
> 
> R & R greatly appreciated! If demand arose i may write more chapters :)

**Author's Note:**

> R & R greatly appreciated!


End file.
